Why do we celebrate birthdays? Actually, why is it that we focus on the person born on the day instead of the mother who gave birth? I know this is not necessarily an original thought, but it is now two days after the "birthday weekend," and I am still exhausted. The night out with 4 energetic eight year old girls, the Saturday full of family and food, and the Sunday full of regular Sunday stuff, plus actual birthday stuff, reminded me of another weekend in the not so distant past when I was equally overwhelmed and exhausted.
It was this same weekend, 1999. After weeks of kidney problems and pregnancy issues, Haley Christiana Merrick entered our lives. Only 14 hours after the doctors decided she should come out, she arrived. (Yes, a mere 14 hours of pain and fear...and yet I would go on to do it again two more times....) My first thoughts when I saw her? I think my exact words were, "Could some one just take her, so I can go to sleep?" And I've been asking for sleep ever since. She was cute and I loved her immediately, but thus began a tiredness that I don't believe I've ever fully recovered from. Her adorable cry has now turned into a frustrated, "mom!" Her need for constant attention has been replaced by an independence that scares me occasionally. And her cute little baby face has turned into a beautiful little girl face with so much joy and excitement in her eyes she can hardly contain it. Oh, how I love her.
However, back to the issue of my tiredness and problem with the whole birthday celebration. As much as I love Haley, she really didn't do anything significant that day, but arrive. I on the other hand amazed my husband and myself with the actions that occurred for 14 hours that day. I'm not usually one to demand attention...but I was the hero that day, I was the one that suffered and gave every last bit of my strength. So Haley's birthday is actually the day my last bit of energy was expended, and never really given back. Haley's birthday was a great day, but every year since, a party or celebration of some kind has occurred that celebrates Haley, but reminds me that I'm still tired. Still trying to get back some of that energy I had before March 18, 1999.
Is there anyone who can relate? Mom, are you still tired from that wonderful day 34 years ago when I was born? Can you honestly say life has ever gotten back to what it was like before kids? Julie, do you even remember life before Nov 7, 2001? Is there ever a day when you say, "I'm not tired at all?"
As tired as I am on a regular basis, as much as I will lament about my kids wearing me out, I wouldn't change it. If given a chance to do it all over...I know that my life is better because Haley is in it and I love her more and more everyday. She is a reminder that God's plans are bigger and better than my plans and for that I am grateful.
It was this same weekend, 1999. After weeks of kidney problems and pregnancy issues, Haley Christiana Merrick entered our lives. Only 14 hours after the doctors decided she should come out, she arrived. (Yes, a mere 14 hours of pain and fear...and yet I would go on to do it again two more times....) My first thoughts when I saw her? I think my exact words were, "Could some one just take her, so I can go to sleep?" And I've been asking for sleep ever since. She was cute and I loved her immediately, but thus began a tiredness that I don't believe I've ever fully recovered from. Her adorable cry has now turned into a frustrated, "mom!" Her need for constant attention has been replaced by an independence that scares me occasionally. And her cute little baby face has turned into a beautiful little girl face with so much joy and excitement in her eyes she can hardly contain it. Oh, how I love her.
However, back to the issue of my tiredness and problem with the whole birthday celebration. As much as I love Haley, she really didn't do anything significant that day, but arrive. I on the other hand amazed my husband and myself with the actions that occurred for 14 hours that day. I'm not usually one to demand attention...but I was the hero that day, I was the one that suffered and gave every last bit of my strength. So Haley's birthday is actually the day my last bit of energy was expended, and never really given back. Haley's birthday was a great day, but every year since, a party or celebration of some kind has occurred that celebrates Haley, but reminds me that I'm still tired. Still trying to get back some of that energy I had before March 18, 1999.
Is there anyone who can relate? Mom, are you still tired from that wonderful day 34 years ago when I was born? Can you honestly say life has ever gotten back to what it was like before kids? Julie, do you even remember life before Nov 7, 2001? Is there ever a day when you say, "I'm not tired at all?"
As tired as I am on a regular basis, as much as I will lament about my kids wearing me out, I wouldn't change it. If given a chance to do it all over...I know that my life is better because Haley is in it and I love her more and more everyday. She is a reminder that God's plans are bigger and better than my plans and for that I am grateful.
5 comments:
i would just like to say that my life, thanks for asking, has not been the same since sophie came into it. i too have lost out on some sleep...
I'd like to comment on a comment. I just can't stop laughing from jrs' comment!!..."ME TOO, ME TOO, ME TOO!!!!!"
All these comments ARE on a very excellently expressed blog! Well done, well done!
I just wrote the best explanation of being tired but since I had not set up a blog I guess I lost it. It was a jewel of my mind, straight from my wisdom but now it is gone. Well!
Just you wait; you think you're tired now. wait until you're standing on the driveway at 2am waiting for your baby to be safe at home. just wait until you have time to go to the show mid day, all the bedrooms are neat and clean, no noise of little people arguing, asking questions or just wanting to sit in your lap. Yeah just wait its nothing to be dreamed of. Instead of tiredness, you have sadness over the gone tomorrow (never to be again)So take being tired its really nicer.
Aaahhhhhhh! Now I have to cry!!!!
That "Aaahhhh" is supposed to be an "Aaaaawwwww", a sad sound, not scary or mad. Just wanted to clear that up. Thanks...So sad :o(
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